Another Writing Struggle

barton_fink-typewriter1

photo credit to curnblog.com

I always end up staring blankly at the ceiling
Waiting and looking for a pinch of inspiration
But no matter how hard I try it’s always nothing
I should search deeper to find that certain emotion

Words, thoughts, and ideas – they are scrambling in my head
Flipping in my bed trying to find inner calmness
Yet I still can’t figure out the things I could have said
All I have is my rambling mind with clutter and mess

And so… I just stare again blankly at the ceiling
Now just allowing the words to take me to a trip
Emptying the mind, start from the very beginning
But oh my! This is only making me fall asleep

– March 15, 2018

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I Love You, Goodbye

couple arguing

photo credit to moneycrashers.com

Writer’s Note: Of course, the title is the same as Celine Dion’s song so just want to give that song a credit.

How do I convey the things that I want to say?
What more should I do to convince you to please stay?
I wish I could wipe the tears rolling in your eyes
If only I could stop all your whimpers and cries

Is this the end of the seven years – the end of us?
Can’t we have another chance? Let’s talk, let’s discuss
Is it that easy to throw everything all away?
Please forgive me, I didn’t mean to go astray

“It was you who had thrown everything all away
You forgot about us and let lust lead your way
I can’t forget it no matter how much I try
I hate to say it – I love you but this is goodbye”

– March 28, 2018

Waiting

photo credit to jmco.com

My friend, you have
Been counting the clock’s minutes
Frustrated, getting restless
Patience is stretched to its limits
Uneasy, feeling reckless

Well, will you please stop worrying
Just welcome the world of waiting

It’s going to take a while
Take a deep breath, take a seat
It’s going to be a mile
Just relax, don’t sweat it

My friend, you have
Been staring at your email
Hoping you’ll see an answer
You’re setting yourself to fail
Just say a little prayer

Come on, just please stop worrying
Say hi to the world of waiting

It’s going to take a while
Take a deep breath, take a seat
It’s going to be a mile
Just relax, don’t sweat it

Oh yeah, it’s gonna be a while
So just relax, just chill, just smile
Yeah, just relax, just chill, just smile

– September 19, 2017

One More Time / Muli

reaching out

photo credit to kasadawai. blogspot.com

Writer’s Note: This was originally written in Filipino (the one below) and the one in English was the translation.

I knew you and I are not meant to last long
But I took the chance for to you I belong
Now, all I have are your memories that linger
Hopefully they’ll be with me until forever

Yet I’m still clueless, I don’t know what to do
For I cannot bear this pain of losing you
Our hopes, our dreams, they are all fading away
If only I had found a way to make you stay

Tell me how can I bring back the yesterday
Let me bring back what God had taken away
For I want to be with you for one more time
I need to kiss you again for one last time

Sa simula alam ko nang hindi tayo magtatagal
Ngunit pinili kita dahil ako’y sayo, aking mahal
Ngayon ang alaala mo lang ang aking hinahawakan
Sana’y kapiling ko ang mga ito hanggang katapusan

Ngunit ako’y naguguluhan, hindi alam ang gagawin
Dahil ang sakit ng iyong paglisan di ko kayang dalhin
Ang ating mga pangarap ay unti unting naglalaho
Kung alam ko lang ang paraan na ika’y hindi lumayo

Paano maibabalik ang lumipas na kahapon?
Paano ibabalik ang kinuha na ng Panginoon?
Kung maaari lang, nais kitang muling makasama
Kung maaari lang, sana’y mahagkan muli kita

– December 22, 2017

The Devil’s Voice

devil's mirror

photo credit to youtube.com (this is probably a screenshot of a demo song)

I hear the devil’s voice
Whispering closely to my ear
Telling me things
That something bad will happen
I’m hopeless, helpless
And all I can do is cry

I hear the devil’s voice
Telling me truths about life
Uncovering all secrets
Showing me the path, the way
I’m amused, amazed
And all I can do is to listen

I hear the devil’s voice
Calling my name
Commanding me to end it all
“It will set you free, find peace,”‎
I struggle, it’s hard to resist
‎Oh God, freedom is so tempting!

I hear the devil’s voice
It’s screaming, shouting at me
Then a light so bright appears
Shattering everything – all is lie
But I can hardly see, it’s a blur
As I break down, I’m on my knees

Oh God, help me please…

– February 27, 2018

Today…

heartbroken

photo credit to emojipedia.com

Today, I realized I’d never be the same
Without you, there’d be no passion, life would be lame
But why did you even tell me to wait, to stay?
Now how am I supposed to face the coming days?

Today, I tried to accept my reality
That you and I are probably not meant to be
But at least tell me the reason, give me closure
Until when do you plan to keep this torture?

So today, I just spent all my hours sulking
I kept checking my messages but still nothing
Then wondered where would I be if you’d ever leave
Oh why did you give me hope and make me believe?

– October 23, 2017

Farewell Again

Here I am, going to bid my farewell again
To a chaotic yet a fun roller coaster
It’s been heck of a ride but true lessons I gained
To bring me as I embark to wherever

Here I am, closing another chapter again
With only hope for a future that is brighter
Leaving a past with frustrations I can’t contain
Marking a new journey for this lost traveler

– November 21, 2017