Tonight is the Night

photo obtained from schoolcertificateonline.com

photo obtained from schoolcertificateonline.com

Author`s Note: Behind ako sa blog ko so magpopost pa ko ng isa pa. Ang post na eto ay tungkol sa exam results. Nakakatawa kasi sinabi ko dito na ang passion ko ay tungkol sa history, literature, crimes, art, games – those are my interests not my passion. Obviously, during this time, despite having written a lot of things already, I never realized that it was my true passion. Well, at least eventually nafigure out ko rin. Pumasa nga pala ko dito, anyway, enjoy 🙂

Dexter Morgan has said: “Tonight is the night… And it’s going to happen… again and again… has to happen…”

What will happen tonight? The results are out tonight, it needs to happen tonight, again and again… it should happen!

So tonight… I’ve been waiting for this. I don’t know what would happen till then…

Is it a pass? Or is it fail?

Deep inside, I know I want to pass this exam – to finish this until the end; to finally say that I’ve accomplished this, but then what? Will I be truly happy? What if this isn’t what I like? What if this isn’t meant for me?

What if I fail? Will I consider now myself as free? Will I be able to do what I really want in life – and what are those things? To fulfill my fetish in history, in literature, in serial killers and crimes? Or something related about gaming? Or to be like Nick Buchanan (but I’ll just be doing small art attacks)? I know I cannot do any of these things as my career; these are just my hobbies anyway.

So what now? It’s only six in the evening and I’ve got three more hours to kill… Can’t do my hobbies either cause I can’t seem to concentrate. It seems that this has been the longest three hours of my life…

And now I wonder… Where will I be tomorrow?

– written on August 19, 2008

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