Author’s Note: I posted the poem earlier and here’s the full text of my 2016 wrap-up.
If 2015 was The Year of Boredom, 2016 was The Year of Lost Passion.
Story of Boredom (2015 continued…)
It was quietly disguise as a paradise
It took me a while to finally realize
It was a journey to the bottom of the pit
I was hell-bound, I know I had to resist
I had been struggling with boredom since 2015. It continued in 2016 and I reached the peak (or the bottom?) of boredom. Good thing, Pokemon Go happened. So in summer 2016, catching Pokemons was the only thing I was looking forward to in each workday. I know it was shallow but it made me realize how unhappy I was in my day job.
I tried to be patient and endured the agony. I hoped for something good to happen despite being clueless on what would that be. The boredom paved the way for me to write more and let my imagination wander. The boredom was a blessing in disguise, actually. Though I still haven’t finished my short story, I found a different side of a writer in me and re-affirm that writing is my true aspiration. It was so tempting to just stay put, to write while continue earning from my day job but then…
Story of Lost Passion
I was unsure, it was difficult to break away
Until I lost my passion along the way
And the absence of fire I can no longer bear
It was my wake up call, time to start all over
But then… I’m such a geek and I enjoy the finance profession. I want to be in a place where I can add value. I want to wake up each workday and look forward to contributing to the company. It was no longer challenging and it led to boredom and that boredom took away my drive towards my work. When I lost my drive, I realized I want to be passionate in both worlds, at least for now – to write on the side and to have a fulfilling day job. And so…
Story of Exploration
So I closed that chapter and welcomed a new norm
Hoping to bring back that something to its full form
Though it is an infinite travel to passion
I am now excited at this exploration
And so… I finally pulled myself from my comfortable boredom. Work is a menial part of my life but I still devote a lot of time to it each day. I don’t want to waste my hours feeling miserable. Luckily, I found a new job. Now, I’m determined to bring back the passion, fire, and drive that I lost in my 2015-2016 journey.
I know I will no longer be as enthusiastic about my day job compared to 3-4 years ago. It is a conscious choice as I’m in very different state now – work is no longer my top priority. As long as I’m not wasting hours, then I am good. In my new job, I am no longer bored, I am no longer miserable, and I am slowly getting my drive back. Then hopefully, I would get more emotional and financial security from my day job so I can craft a plan to reach my dream as a writer. Then eventually transition – to do finance work on the side and to write full time (oh gosh, this is so far-fetched *face palm*).
By the way, during the time when I was so pumped up because of the new job, an accident happened which caused stress to my household. Thank God there was no casualty and the result was favourable to us. But it was a speed bump reminding me about more important things in life.
Anyway, if 2015 was The Year of Boredom and 2016 was The Year of Lost Passion, I wonder what 2017 would be? This year, besides getting my drive back, I also want to continue my “less-junk-food” lifestyle and be healthy. Most of all, I want to continue my travel to passion. I am so excited to explore the things I will write. I am so excited to be more inspired while of course, still singing and dancing (Bollywood style) to the sound track from my favorite movie of all time, 3 Idiots…
All izz well
Woot woot woot
Hey bro, all izz well…
– January 12, 2017