Defeated

I fell and I stumbled
I was down, I was troubled
I can’t pick myself up
There was no way to get up
No strength to even try
And all I could do was cry
From despair, from anger
For not having the power
To control my dumb mind
Then command the brain to find
The love and the passion
To seek a motivation
But I only faltered
To defeat, I surrendered

– July 10, 2019

The Devil’s Voice

devil's mirror

photo credit to youtube.com (this is probably a screenshot of a demo song)

I hear the devil’s voice
Whispering closely to my ear
Telling me things
That something bad will happen
I’m hopeless, helpless
And all I can do is cry

I hear the devil’s voice
Telling me truths about life
Uncovering all secrets
Showing me the path, the way
I’m amused, amazed
And all I can do is to listen

I hear the devil’s voice
Calling my name
Commanding me to end it all
“It will set you free, find peace,”‎
I struggle, it’s hard to resist
‎Oh God, freedom is so tempting!

I hear the devil’s voice
It’s screaming, shouting at me
Then a light so bright appears
Shattering everything – all is lie
But I can hardly see, it’s a blur
As I break down, I’m on my knees

Oh God, help me please…

– February 27, 2018

Please Stay

Slowly, slowly…
You’re drifting away
Sadly, oh so sadly
I can’t make you stay

I’m helpless, so helpless
You said you need space
Now I fear this emptiness
To long for your embrace

I understand, I know
You want this to end
But I cannot let go
We should try to mend

Slowly, eventually…
You will slip away
Sadly, oh so badly
I know you won’t stay

– November 16, 2016

Thunderstorm

composite-storm_jc-copy1

photo credit to assahifa.net

I woke up from the roar of a thunder
Then I listened to the pouring rain
I checked if you were awake
Then it hit me – you already left
You were no longer here
The tears just rolled
I wiped it off then I felt alone.
Soon, I decided to get up
Then I looked over the window
The street was wet and muddy
The garden was bleak
Petals were blown
It was a gloomy Saturday morn.
So I ate breakfast to cheer myself up
I tried to ignore the storm
Until I saw the empty chair
And I can’t help but be glum
As the rain fell,
And so were my tears
But I fought hard to be back at my feet
I tried to move on, to start anew
I acted as if all was all right
But I was helpless –
I was just feeling more low…

The thunderstorm outside was deafening
And all I heard were the roars of thunders
And the sounds of the pouring rain…

– May 24, 2016