Traveling To A Blurred Destiny

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photo credit to pixabay.com

A crossroad? No! I can’t even see a road
It is being in the woods with a blind fold
I’m totally lost, wandering the unknown
Just trusting my senses to lead me to you

And I keep stumbling, falling into the pit
Picking myself up gets harder and harder
But I try to follow the sound of your voice
‎It’s my only guide in this bleak surrounding

As I open my eyes with hope to see clearly
There’s a fog, it’s enveloping the horizon
And all I can do is to pray, to listen
Then continue this journey with only faith…

I’m still stuck somewhere in the woods, in the pit
It’s unlikely I’ll figure my way out soon
But as long as I hear your voice, calling me
I know I’m in the path towards my destiny

– October 2, 2017

Lost Traveller

lost traveller

photo credit to thelosttraveller.com

The mind wanders into an endless road
With a burden it’s trying to unload
Then look for passion to bring back the fire
So as to follow the heart’s only desire

The mind’s travel starts in a paradise
With all hopes, without the uncovered lies
But the path widens into an abyss
The mind then panics, it struggles to find peace

The mind can’t escape, there’s nowhere to hide
The only way out is to enjoy this ride
So it drifts – like freely flows with the sea
As the mind’s a floater, lost in this journey

– August 18, 2017

The Story Of 2016 (Full Text)

flog-tk

photo credit to flog.tk

Author’s Note: I posted the poem earlier and here’s the full text of my 2016 wrap-up.

If 2015 was The Year of Boredom, 2016 was The Year of Lost Passion.

Story of Boredom (2015 continued…)

It was quietly disguise as a paradise
It took me a while to finally realize
It was a journey to the bottom of the pit
I was hell-bound, I know I had to resist

I had been struggling with boredom since 2015. It continued in 2016 and I reached the peak (or the bottom?) of boredom. Good thing, Pokemon Go happened. So in summer 2016, catching Pokemons was the only thing I was looking forward to in each workday. I know it was shallow but it made me realize how unhappy I was in my day job.

I tried to be patient and endured the agony. I hoped for something good to happen despite being clueless on what would that be. The boredom paved the way for me to write more and let my imagination wander. The boredom was a blessing in disguise, actually. Though I still haven’t finished my short story, I found a different side of a writer in me and re-affirm that writing is my true aspiration. It was so tempting to just stay put, to write while continue earning from my day job but then…

Story of Lost Passion

‎I was unsure, it was difficult to break away
Until I lost my passion along the way
And the absence of fire I can no longer bear
It was my wake up call, time to start all over

But then… I’m such a geek and I enjoy the finance profession. I want to be in a place where I can add value. I want to wake up each workday and look forward to contributing to the company. It was no longer challenging and it led to boredom and that boredom took away my drive towards my work. When I lost my drive, I realized I want to be passionate in both worlds, at least for now – to write on the side and to have a fulfilling day job. And so…

Story of Exploration

So I closed that chapter and welcomed a new norm
Hoping to bring back that something to its full form
Though it is an infinite travel to passion
I am now excited at this exploration

And so… I finally pulled myself from my comfortable boredom. Work is a menial part of my life but I still devote a lot of time to it each day. I don’t want to waste my hours feeling miserable. Luckily, I found a new job. Now, I’m determined to bring back the passion, fire, and drive that I lost in my 2015-2016 journey.

I know I will no longer be as enthusiastic about my day job compared to 3-4 years ago. It is a conscious choice as I’m in very different state now – work is no longer my top priority. As long as I’m not wasting hours, then I am good. In my new job, I am no longer bored, I am no longer miserable, and I am slowly getting my drive back. Then hopefully, I would get more emotional and financial security from my day job so I can craft a plan to reach my dream as a writer. Then eventually transition – to do finance work on the side and to write full time (oh gosh, this is so far-fetched *face palm*).

By the way, during the time when I was so pumped up because of the new job, an accident happened which caused stress to my household. Thank God there was no casualty and the result was favourable to us. But it was a speed bump reminding me about more important things in life.‎

Anyway, if 2015 was The Year of Boredom and 2016 was The Year of Lost Passion, I wonder what 2017 would be? This year, besides getting my drive back, I also want to continue my “less-junk-food” lifestyle and be healthy. Most of all, I want to continue my travel to passion. I am so excited to explore the things I will write. I am so excited to be more inspired while of course, still singing and dancing (Bollywood style) to the sound track from my favorite movie of all time, 3 Idiots…

All izz well
Woot woot woot
Hey bro, all izz well…

– January 12, 2017

The Story Of 2016 (Poem)

flog-tk

photo credit to flog.tk

Author’s Note: I started writing a yearly wrap-up in 2013. Here’s a poem summarizing my 2016, with hyperlinks to some poems I wrote last year. I also have a full text which I will post separately and probably later or tomorrow.

It was quietly disguise as a paradise
It took me a while to finally realize
It was a journey to the bottom of the pit
I was hell-bound, I know I had to resist

I was unsure, it was difficult to break away
Until I lost my passion along the way
And the absence of fire I can no longer bear
It was my wake up call, time to start all over

So I closed that chapter and welcomed a new norm
Hoping to bring back that something to its full form
Though it is an infinite travel to passion
I am now excited at this exploration

– January 9, 2017

Jigsaw Puzzle

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Author’s Note: I wrote the poem on January 14, 2015 and I already posted it here last month. Since this is my first attempt to write this way in English, I’m so happy with what I’ve accomplished. I’m satisfied and proud with this so I sincerely hope you’ll enjoy. 🙂

 

This is my second 1,000 piece puzzle. May be I was so engrossed by it the first time that I didn’t notice how awesome it is. Little by little, piece by piece; various chocolates and desserts are slowly coming to life. It’s amazing! Now I’m drooling…

Aside from segregating the pieces by color, I first look for the border and corner pieces. This is my starting point before I dig further into the puzzle. It helps me visualize the image. Next, I try to figure out the pieces beside the edges but usually this doesn’t work. Despite the border pieces, it is still vague; I just dive right into it and look for whatever that fits.

Finishing it is not an exact science. It’s wherever it takes me. The border pieces are just there as a guide. Oftentimes, I can’t find any piece that fits. I get stuck so I have to go back and check all the pieces over and over again to look for that important detail. After several minutes and still nothing, I conclude there are missing pieces. It’s frustrating! It’s like searching for a needle in a hay stack. When I reach this point, I relax, step back, then re-examine the pieces. This time, from a different angle. Then I remind myself that it underwent quality control; that there is assurance that the pieces are complete – I have to trust its creator. I just need to keep on looking for that one piece (or may be a couple) and for that special detail that will magically glue them altogether. I will just be surprised my collage is slowly forming variety of desserts. Yet again, I’m drooling…

IMG_20150117_231804It’s unbelievable how those tiny pieces of puzzle tell their own story. Each one is unique and special. Each comes in different shapes – one piece can never be a substitute of the other. Each one is key. Each contributes to be part of the overall picture. All of them are connected. If one is missing, the puzzle can never be whole.

Same as life, isn’t it?

The puzzle pieces are life experiences. The inter-connected life experiences that I fail to recognize. Then, the special details are the lessons. The key lessons that I tend to neglect. They need to be found and understood before everything falls into place.

Like doing the border pieces first, in life, I always try to begin with the end in mind. It helps me create a plan. But usually, I get confused. I get lost. I ignored a blotch of an ink without realizing it is the most critical detail. Same as solving a jigsaw, I need to be patient. I need to be determined. I need to re-focus and look at things differently. Otherwise, I will accomplish nothing. So, while keeping my faith and trust intact, I go with the flow; see where it leads me.

You know what’s the best part in solving a jigsaw puzzle? It is the experience of putting all those pieces together. I appreciate its magnificent beauty more because of the challenge and excitement of finishing it. It could get frustrating. It is time consuming. But that’s the fun part! I just have to enjoy the ride and keep on searching for the magical pieces. The process of discovery is priceless!

Life is a boundless beauty and it’s an exciting journey to get there. Let’s enjoy the ride and grab the opportunity to discover its wonder. Isn’t it amazing that those small jigsaw pieces all fit together in a masterpiece called life?

‎Life is truly a wonder
Amazing, boundless beauty
It’s something to discover
Let’s open our hearts and see

It’s to search for a needle
In a field with stack of hays
It’s a thousand piece puzzle
That will soon fall into place

Each piece is key and special
To form and fit together
Every step is material
It’s a journey to ponder

 

– written on February 6, 2015

A Puzzle

Author’s Note: I plan to expand more about this in a journal format. Hopefully, I’ll find the perfect time to write about this.

Life is truly a wonder
Amazing, boundless beauty
It’s something to discover
Let’s open our hearts and see

It’s to search for a needle
In a field with stack of hays
It’s a thousand piece puzzle
That will soon fall into place

Each piece is key and special
To form and fit together
Every step is material
It’s a journey to ponder

– written on January 13, 2015